I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
