She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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