My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
