He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
