I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Randomize