I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
