it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
