Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
