we made out on top of his cat.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Randomize
