If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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