you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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