I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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