well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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