i just google imaged poop.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
