And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
