I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
