you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
