i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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