My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
