i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
