i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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