was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
