If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
