There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
one two three fourrrrnication!
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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