Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
