her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
