She's like a pop up book from hell.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
