If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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