No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize