So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
