It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
