I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Drunk is a universal language darling
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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