**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize
