she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize