just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize