hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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