i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize