she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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