i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
