did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
