Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
