WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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