To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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