Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
