He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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