Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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