i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
