Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
