just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
