O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
