my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Please don't give away my fajitas
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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