The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
What changed your mind?
Being sober
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
